Thursday, August 31, 2006


I'm standing on the doorstep of the future, and I realize:
1. I've forgotten my pants.
2. I don't know how I got here.
3. The door is locked.

Why does 27 seem like:
1. Such a large number?
2. Such an old number?
3. Such a close number to 30?

I am learning that men see the phone as:
1. A way to order pizza.
2. An inconvenience.
3. The means to teach me an inordinate amount of patience.

Just because you put on a leotard:
1. Doesn't mean you're a dancer.
2. Doesn't make you look slimmer.
3. Doesn't make you graceful.

Three morally questionable things I do:
1. The occassional "borrowing" of wireless internet.
2. Speeding through school zones.
3. Pretending I don't see my dog pooping, thereby negating the use of the plastic bag I have stuffed in my pocket.

Three things I love:
1. My dog.
2. Singing.
3. Laughter...that I've caused.

Three things that annoy me:
1. The noises people make when they eat.
2. Being touched while I eat.
3. People eating off my plate.

Three wishes:
1. Smaller thighs.
2. Bigger boobs.
3. Ending world hunger, blah, blah, blah...

Three things I try to be, but will never be:
1. Neat.
2. Patient.
3. What's a good word for "not intense"?

Three reasons why this blog post is weird:
1. I'm exhausted.
2. I ate bad Chinese food.
3. There's nothing good on TV.


Anonymous said...


Sarah said...

Are you referring to my post? If so, at least check your spelling....

Lisa said...

Wow! What a witty, insightful, and wise post! I thoroughly enjoyed it! Two enthusiastic thumbs up!